Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Do vagina's smell?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize