This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Come on in and take your pants off
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