he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
