yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
True strength comes from lack of pants
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize