sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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