I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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