we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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