I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
