why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize