At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
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