nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
