I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Randomize
