11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
