Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
