I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize