this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Randomize