I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
