You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
