We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
