Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
