it wasn't lemon gatorade
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize