They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
