it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
