white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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