The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
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