But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
God, you're like boner-b-gone
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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