is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
