I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
