Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
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