I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize