But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
