My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
