i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
3pm strippers are depressing
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize