But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
