I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
