i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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