this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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