im drinking this country out of the recession.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
