She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
