please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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