i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
home. puking in laundry basket.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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