yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
