That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
