Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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