ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize