I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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