See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
We need to rekindle our bromance
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize