Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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