We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
