no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
accomplished twins. life is a go
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
