He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
